Making a commitment

In case you always wondered what it was like to make a life-long commitment… I think its worth reading my post now. :)
I always wondered how I would do making a commitment to be there for someone else… all the time… anytime…?

Actually we guys and girls in India grew lucky.. for there is so much culture and tradition to draw from, that even without our knowledge… The concepts of unconditional…. Unconditional giving… stepping aside to make space… and prioratising another persons’ happiness above other things comes almost naturally to us. Think about it. We’ve done it for friends.. we’ve done it for Parents. I hope you realize how precious and rare this is. In so many countries… SO many people… live a whole Lifetime without ever knowing the peace that comes with giving.
I never thought I would write these words! :) But there is something divine… Love is truly the gift of God, for it can allow one (if you allow yourself) to discover oneself in ways they never knew before… and one can choose how they want to… they can experience most beautiful things by simply making another person happy.
Sometimes…. Cultures that grow without a strong family culture show the weakness… they begin to get confused… and unless one is willing to accept that giving to someone might actually be a responsibility, they wander around denying it until they find they have no one to come home to.
Receiving love is certainly one aspect of marriage… But then.. that is just one aspect…. Marriage is about giving of yourself to another person. The vows of marriage mean that you have sworn to make anothers’ Life your own… and share yours with them. Maangalyam tham thuraanena mama jeevana ek thuna…thanthe bhathnaami subhake thwam jeeva shathaa amshatham… Is the powerful mantra in my religion which proclaims that I now wed thee for ever more to share our separate lives as one.
Sometimes… for some people… they don’t even need the ritual of an elaborate wedding to join their hearts in union. After all… a ritual does not by itself, seal anything. Marriage is a meeting of minds. Everything else follows. Period.
Everyone keeps asking me… ‘How does it feel, to be married??’ I feel like replying… ‘Why don’t you try the vows yourself and find out?!!’ :D The point Im trying to make is: there is no one definition of a marriage… Its different for each individual. And yes, this blog partially in answer to that question. If at all this is an answer. :)
I should write another blog about how marriage can make one ‘grow up!’ :) Having said that, let me also say that… One becomes an individual in one’s own right… giving you the right.. the option… to say ‘yes’ or ‘no’ as one pleases…. This freedom is in fact, a responsibility. For one’s decisions could actually have impacts. And you are no longer the only person who will feel it. Scary huh?
Marriage is something that can make you grow into the individual one chooses to be. At many points, there is a choice… How do you want to handle it? At those pivotal junctures, knowing one’s mind well enough… to foresee what will matter not only today, but tomorrow also… more than just foresight, to understand the person you want to be… Is the end objective.
So, my final take would be: Soak in experiences before you decide to marry… discover yourself… and then decide how you want your Self to be expressed in this World. If you find the other suiting your expression: then please marry him/her. If not: you can still choose to love them. :) Finally, loving someone means giving them the freedom to be who they are. And many times: that is when a communion of this kind will work!. :)
Finally… What I would like to sign off by saying is…Whatever happens…. Don’t let yourself be defined by roles that are set for you by ‘society’ or ‘tradition’… You are your own person and can afford to be intelligent enough to live Life the way that brings you maximum satisfaction/happiness. One can choose to follow tradition… But always bear in mind all tradition is a means to an end… an objective … an experience, but are not an end in themselves. Eg: Prayer is not the point. But peace and faith is the objective. Does that make sense?
The ones who conform do just that: conform. They rarely live a full life. Perhaps that is closer to what I am trying to say…
I sound too profound! Im scaring myself. I think I miss good old socializing… too much contemplation. :D ehehhe
Take Care all. A special mention of good Luck to my juniors with their placements. :) Remember: the interviewer is not the real measure of your worth. What you do after this ‘first job’ will determine how your careers will shape up. Don’t let this first step blow itself out of proportion. Everyone has a first break. A first job. People’s careers were rarely shaped by their first job. Many millionaire’s career began when they quit their first job. Does this help put it in perspective? :) Take Heart and keep that chin up.
Until later then
Raje